an apology

I'm sorry my blog posts have been shit lately. I know all I ever talk about is

a) English homework
b) school (in general)
c) general YouTube fangirling.

And that's not fair to you, [insert READER NAME here]! You deserve my top-quality blogs! I mean, sure, this is a bit of a cat blog, but I at least want to ENTERTAIN!

I have a pretty limited understanding of the things in the world, therefore a limited things to blog about. I like English and I go on the internet a lot. I go to school. I like reading and talking about books and literature. I mean really. That's my life. I don't date, I don't socialize (much, though it seems I'm going to prom...), I just do what I like and say "fuck the rest."

And as much as I love Little Miss Sunshine... is that really a fair way to take on life? I'm not exposing myself to anything new by doing the same old thing, sticking with the same old clique of people (online: Nerdfighters), everything I do and like and listen to (music-wise) is somehow related to the rest.

Should I go out and get drunk? Do I need to "find myself" by doing drugs? Hell no, not where I was going... but what can I do? I keep telling myself I'll "wait until college," where I can really "come out."

But am I to blame if I earnestly have "found myself?" I know who I am - am I supposed to ignore that? But even P-Nelli struggled with English in high school; he was a math nerd, a science geek, not an English buff. English was a challenge to him -- that's why he majored in it in college. What am I supposed to do?

Identity crisis much.

Stupid being-a-confused-and-socially-awkward-teenager-with-a-soapbox.

3 Response to "an apology"

  1. Darci O. says:

    Katy! My angst blog was not supposed to make you rethink your life.

    And I think with the little miss sunshine quote is more saying don't let other people or things hold you back from what you love. That's not to say that you have to stick with the same old things forever.

    You don't need chemicals to find yourself, those are what you use to lose yourself. (a shorter form of that should be used by D.A.R.E. or something. I'm trademarking it now)

    I knew who I was at a pretty young age too, and ridiculed my brother for being a "poseur" all the time. I was a mean older brother.

    What is it with the worms and angst blogs lately?!

    Also, I agree with Alan. "You don't need chemicals..." etc. You know I agree with him. :)

    Love youuuu <3

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